I Choose To Fall.
The moon peers at me through the clouds. I am sitting atop the sand dunes on the beach. Here, I feel beautifully isolated and peaceful. The waves sing to me the most remarkable of songs while I sit quietly. The wind nips at my hair playfully as I take deep, meditative breaths.
I am currently embracing this solitude for it is key to my inner growth. The salty air fills my lungs with a friendly sense of familiarity and I feel utterly at bliss. I glance over to my left and see a couple walking up to their ankles in the ocean. I know that they cannot see me and do not know I am here.
She begins jogging ahead of him and he chases her. He scoops her up into his arms and lovingly spins her around in circles. Her sweet laugh echoes out onto the water and back again. She jokes about how she’s dizzy and may fall over but he holds her steady. I feel honored to observe these raw moments of pure love and ultimate happiness. He holds her face in his hands as he kisses her deeply, passionately.
My heart flutters as I remember that feeling of another’s lips parting with mine. How when we hugged, it was like our rib cages were tangled together. I remembered how it felt to have fingers dance across my skin in the most intimate of moments.
I have been through my fair share of hurt but at the end of the day, I know it’s all worth it. I have always been a lover and many have told me that it was a curse but I believe it’s a blessing. As I watch them out there, I feel that we should fall in Love with as many things as possible. Life is crazy and can be cut short at any moment. I want to feel Love over and over again. I want my body to warm up as butterflies rip through my chest because of the way he looks at me. I want to feel tears roll down my cheeks as I look into the happy, grey-fur lined eyes of our old family dog. I want to laugh so hard my stomach hurts when I see a totally candid and hilarious shot I snapped of my best friend.
Some people say “no” to Love. They claim they’ve been hurt so many times that they can no longer feel it or fear opening back up to it. For me, this simply is not possible because I see Love everywhere. Being who I am, I will always thrive when in Love. This can be with anything or anyone. When I am aligned with this blissful, beautiful feeling, I am complete.
Many thoughts go through my mind nowadays…and I can gladly say that they are positive and loving. I have been more aligned with Love lately than I have been in so long and the crazy part is…I’ve been experiencing it alone. I’ve dove into the fantastical mysteries of Self Love and am amazed by the answers I have uncovered. Once you have learned this art, nothing can take this bliss away from you.
Blame it on me being a Libra/Scorpio Cusp if you’d like…but I often feel my heart exploding with passion for the feelings of reveling joyously in Love. I would look for Love in everything outside of myself but never thought about looking within. And now that I’ve activated this part of me, I am radiating with unconditional excitement.
There are many reasons why I do not fear falling in Love. I am not ashamed and do not see this as vulnerability, but strength. I know in my heart that whatever I pour my Love into moving forward, that it will be magical, real and wild. To me, the descent into Love is the most exhilarating trust fall there is. And it’s in the moments where I’m driving into the sunset, giggling with my friends, dancing alone in my bedroom or staring into his eyes that I realize what’s truly important in my life.
These are the moments that will live on forever within my heart along with the footsteps of all of these remarkable beings. Whether our friendship or Love lasts forever, the memories will.
And this is why I choose to fall.
• xoxo •