Creative Writing · Full Archive · Inspiration

when we know it is time.

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when we know it is time.

the sky opens before me, revealing the answers to the questions i have asked many times

i step forward, ready to split myself open and reveal the light within me that always shines

my eyes scan the sea of humans before me and i cannot help but notice the confusion and the stress

they are constantly worried about what they can change yet think of themselves less and less

what is this game we have fallen into and can we beat it?

because i don’t want to come back again, i don’t want to repeat it

the wind blows my hair across my eyes, but my vision is not clouded

for i see the countless of people terrified, their happiness is always shrouded

the darkness is not something to fear, as it is only the absence of light

when we wake up and open our eyes, we will then see everything how it is and begin doing what’s right

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within the sea of people before me, i notice they are not looking up

they are staring at the phones in their hands, not bothering to see us

for i am no longer alone here, i have others behind and beside me

they see what i see, and they want desperately to set them free

but how can they understand us when they are still digesting the lies that were fed to them this morning?

how can they get that there is a fire in this world that is blazing and roaring?

they are wearing blindfolds, content in the game and never asking why

like birds who think it’s normal to sit in a cage, and think it’s crazy to fly

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we stand back, awaiting our time to fight

to fight with love and this beautiful radiant light

violence will never be the answer, it will destroy all possible solutions

this is why we must wake up from the system and all of its illusions

for when we truly acknowledge the power we have in the game

it will change

we will step up and allow ourselves to shine

when we know, it is time

 


 

• xoxo •

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Full Archive · Inspiration

the truth about detachment.

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This morning, I took my dog for a walk out in our backyard here in Florida. The sun was shining, the birds were converging and the squirrels were chasing each other through the trees. It was absolutely glorious outside and I took a moment to show gratitude for the beautiful day and for my dog, Harley.

My feet took me a few more steps when I came across a beautiful, pink flower. It was just lying there on the ground, completely detached. I knelt down to pick it up and held it in my hand, inspecting its beauty.

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It was in this moment where a profound thought entered into my mind:

“this flower is so beautiful, regardless of its detachment.”

An immediate smile formed on my lips as I glanced up at the sky. I thought of that wonderful saying that didn’t make sense to me three years ago:

“the root of suffering is attachment” – Buddha

I’ve had a much better understanding of this meaning…especially lately. Through the vibrational shifts I have experienced the past four months, I have learned many important things. Among these things, the importance of solitude has been ringing loudly for me and it’s something I needed to understand. Solitude has been a phenomenal healing experience for me and I know that moving forward, I will always make time for myself to do the inward healing that I need to.

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What’s important to know is that detachment is one of the divine keys to life. How you ask? Well, let me explain this for you…

You know how when you are trying to hold onto a rope that’s pulling away from you, you get what’s called a “rope burn?” You get this with life as well. Sometimes it hurts way more to try desperately to hold on than it is to just let go and I know this for a fact.

Allowing yourself to love something or someone is blissful, but do this with a sense of detachment. Yes, you can immerse yourself in this love and fully take part in it but you need to be okay if it suddenly leaves you. A huge mistake people often make in life is that they define their happiness with some outside influence. So, when this thing leaves, we are standing alone in a dark hallway holding our aching chest.

Simply accepting what is and allowing what is meant to be flow in and out of your life when it should is a great level of understanding and awareness that will truly help you move forward. A great example of this is a relationship when it suddenly cuts to an end. Being able to say, “I am okay, this was meant to happen because I have something to learn here. I will survive and I am okay with this” will allow you the freedom living. Without an unhealthy attachment, you will be able to navigate this life with ease knowing that you will simply accept what happens. It’s a beautiful bliss that I am so happy I have had the opportunity to experience fully. Now, when I open up to things, I do so with that sense of detachment.

“if this leaves me, I will be okay. I will survive. Let it come and let it be.” 

Find this comfort within yourself and within everything you are attached too. This is not unhealthy, it only becomes unhealthy when you are trying to hold onto something so tightly that it is being smothered. And unfortunately, this happens a lot with love.

Detachment is a key because you take your power back.

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• xoxo •

Full Archive · Inspiration

yes.

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yes.

As many of you already know, my life changed dramatically a few months ago. In this time, I’ve been doing so much work on myself and have come a long way from where I was. A relationship ended that I truly thought was going to last forever (don’t we all think this?).

Day after day, I fell more in love with this amazing thing called solitude. For those of you who know me personally, I have always been in serious relationships and I was never alone for too long in between. I was looking for love everywhere outside of myself instead of looking inward. I realized this a couple of weeks after my last relationship fell apart. I can honestly say that I laughed at myself when I thought about how desperate I was to find a source of happiness externally.

In these few months, I have grown to truly appreciate myself again and focus on the things I enjoy doing. I will never step back from this as my happiness is now my top priority. I will walk away from whatever does not resonate with me and my path. I will always remain in a positive vibrational space. And, I will say “yes” to love.

I want to fall in love with everything because love is the most important part of life. Love is all you need. So, when an experience comes along that asks me if I love it, I will say “yes.” If a person touches my soul in a deep, profound way, I will say “yes.” Whether it be a stranger showing me genuine kindness, a friend hugging me while watching our favorite movie, or a lover kissing me gently in the doorway. I will say “yes.” And I will do this in a whole different light now. I will do this knowing that I love myself and that I’m truly happy with myself. I do not need to rely on someone else to bring me these great feelings because I can activate it all by myself.

How exhilarating this is…challenging myself in this way. I am so excited for this next chapter in my life and all of the wonderful, beautiful souls I will meet along the way.

Here’s a big “thank you” to the ones who have brought such love and happiness to my heart these past few months. I appreciate you all more than you know.

Thank you, I love you.


 

 • xoxo •

Creative Writing · Full Archive · Inspiration

walk with me.

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walk with me.

walk with me, darling, walk along the beach

my hand dangles at my side, ready for your reach

i know how i feel, the question is, what about you

the fire between us tells me nothing but the truth

i can see this so clearly, but i’m not sure if you can

maybe because it wasn’t a part of your original plan

you are quiet now, step after step through the sand beside me

i hope you realize that with anything, you can confide in me

for i am always here for you, to illuminate the darkness that may haunt you

i want to rip you open and watch your light spill over the floor, i want you to know i want you

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you just keep staring out at the water to our right

can i tell you that your eyes are still the most beautiful thing in sight

in this moment, i’m okay being lost in your presence

you bring me so many feelings, but among them, balance

i want to pick through your chaotic mind and extract only what you should see

there are piles of meaningless junk causing you worry, don’t listen to it, listen to me

even now, i see you contemplating many things

i want to see what about this crazy life makes your heart sing

i decide to take the leap and reach for your hand

you interlock your fingers with mine quickly as we leave footprints in the sand

although we have not spoken, i know you feel it too

this may not be forever, but right now, it is true

there’s a reason not to leave here, a reason not to go

if you love me, let me know

lay your lips on mine, set me free

take a chance, my love, and walk with me


 

• xoxo •

Creative Writing · Full Archive · Inspiration

believer.

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believer.

love is patient, love is kind

love is the only thing i accept into my mind

i choose to smile and to hug my heart

for i realize my true happiness is but an art

one to paint freely across the wall

with stars and trees, and lovers answering the call

the one that rings within the depths of our being

the one that tells us, sight is not just seeing

it is believing


 

• xoxo •

Full Archive · Inspiration · Travels

thanksgiving after standing rock.

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I woke up this Thanksgiving morning feeling some type of way. Before I even opened my eyes, I was already thinking about last year.

I was in North Dakota on the Standing Rock Indian Reservation with hundreds of others peacefully protesting the 3.78 billion dollar pipeline. I remember my then boyfriend and I were worried about our brothers and sisters who were still being affected out there with the freezing temperatures after we had left. We did not want to leave but had to because Eric became violently ill.

Thanksgiving did not feel right at all after that especially with what we had just experienced. The truth behind the history of this “holiday” is nothing pleasant and is definitely not what they teach children in school. After seeing how still, after all of these years, Native Americans are being treated like they aren’t important just knots my stomach.

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Before heading to Standing Rock, we took part in some protests in downtown Phoenix to help spread the word and rally more who would help support the cause. We were standing up to the downright disrespect to Native Americans and to the inevitable threat to our water. This was a huge time for all of us to stand in solidarity to make a real difference and to tell big corporations that this was more important than their money. But, of course, money rules the world. Money turns people into mindless zombies, period.

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I took this photo one afternoon while helping out at various tents and I just knew that it would be one of the most powerful ones I took. After taking this shot, I asked his permission to use it online even though you couldn’t really see his face and he said “yes.”

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Each night we stayed felt colder than the one before. I remember waking up many times because either my toes were cold or I needed to put my hat back on. Eric was such an amazing help as he would get up and boil water for hot chocolate and oatmeal while I was still all bundled up, taking my sweet time. He was pretty freaking good to me!

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I snapped this picture early in the morning because I felt the sun was greeting Eric with a lot of love and I wanted to remember this moment and what I was feeling.

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On the main road entering camp, there were flags lining both sides symbolizing the different people coming together for one cause. It was absolutely beautiful and humbling to see and I had to capture this moment walking through it. I remember tears in my eyes as I lowered the camera after this shot. I saw strength, beauty, courage and hope in the faces of everyone around me. We were surrounded by people who weren’t just going to give up.

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We took part in many of their ceremonial fires and even the water ceremony every morning. We did notice that whenever we were doing a beautiful ceremony, they would fly their helicopters low over us. It was like they did that on purpose to bother us but it didn’t. They did a lot of things to try to get us to retaliate but we never acted violently towards them. The media won’t tell you that, though.

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In this moment, we were listening to a few people speak. Each person made such an impact on the rest of us, who were fully engaged and truly feeling their words. A few minutes after Eric took this picture, I started crying along with many others (yes, I cried quite a bit while I was here).

Remembering all of this leads me to today, November 23, 2017 – Thanksgiving. I roll out of bed and smile to myself, knowing that I helped people while I was there and that people helped me. I smile to myself because I am grateful for everything and everyone in my life. I may not believe in Thanksgiving, but I still choose to live this day with love like I do every other day. I will choose love over fear today. I am sending so much love to everyone who may need it today. I accept and love people for who they are no matter what their culture is or what they look like. I acknowledge everyone’s greatness and have hope in our future. No matter what happens, I know how much power we have over the “big guys” with the money. They may have money, but we have numbers.

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Standing together is how we will make a positive change. Nothing happens when we all sit on our asses, or with our heads buried in the dirt. Many people just want to hide when things get scary and they forget how much influence they can have. Those of us who stood, who protested either here or anywhere, and who directed loving energy this way, I appreciate you more than you could know. Our fresh resources are more important than money. When will we realize that money cannot be eaten? That it has no real value? What will happen when the last drop of water is poisoned or when we are gasping for air that is no longer pure? What about our animals? What about us?

The earth will be here whether we are or not. Sometimes we seem to forget that fact. There is still time to make a change in the way we are living. What are we waiting for?


 

• xoxo •

Creative Writing · Inspiration

i feel you.

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i never knew your body was a hurricane

it swept me up and swallowed all of my pain

you never told me just how deep your eyes were

for when i look into them, i see You and all else is a blur

your presence makes me realize that there’s so much more

your power shot through me, electrifying me to my very core

the kisses you placed upon my body are now stained into my skin

in the midst of the beautiful chaos, i knew this exchange would always win

•    •    •    •    •

– the rest of this poem and many others will be published in my first ever poetry book, “moments” coming soon.


 

• xoxo •